I Solve Life’s Neurological Mystery
I’m sure by now everyone realizes that my husband does not read my blog.
I love him very much, but I also love the freedom to laugh at his craziness, or wonder about his mysteries.
This is a mystery blog.
My husband is not neat. Mostly because he has an impenetrable belief that he should save everything.
He has old catalogs. When a new catalog comes, and I ask him to throw away the old one. he tells me that he wants to know what things ‘used to cost’. Hmm.
And you never know when you might need an old receipt. He keeps receipts for cat food that our kitties have ingested so long ago, it’s not even compost any more.
I am not the neatest woman in the world. I consider myself about average.
Here is a comparison of our respective desks:
Okay, so he’s not neat. No big deal. (just annoying as hell.)
So here’s the mystery.
This is how the peanut butter looks after he has had a snack:
Why does a messy guy do this with the peanut butter?
And it always looks like this. If I stick a knife in there and leave a gouge, the next time I open the peanut butter jar, it looks like this again.
I have concluded that this must have a neurological basis.
I have spent numerous hours comparing our brains. Through diligent scientific observation over the past twenty years, I am now able to share my findings.
This is how my brain works.
This is probably not every women’s brain, but with a few substitutions, it is probably close. Perhaps other hobbies may substitute for writing, books, and art. And women with children probably have a bigger love lobe, with their shoe lobe commensurately smaller. But I am sure that all women have a similarly complicated mix.
And this is my husband’s brain:
Notice that Cars and Sports (Motorsports in my husband’s case) take up approximately the same space that Hair, Makeup, Clothing and Shoes take up in my brain. And whereas he has one Money lobe, mine is split between Money and Jewelry. Guns take up all his hobby space. And my Love lobe is complex – with sublobes for Sex, Family, and Friends. That part of my husband’s brain is defined a bit differently.
And see that tiny little spot near Food that holds his Neatness brain cells? That’s where the peanut butter is.