notquiteold

Gracefully Aging – With Resistance

Just Browsing

No gray hair for me.  I’ve taken care of that issue for years.  I’m a nice golden brown color, and I’m staying that way for the next ten years at least.

But what is up with my EYEBROWS?

My eyebrows have always looked like this:

Not my real eye.

They have an okay shape, as long as I do some serious and frequent hedge-trimming.

But now they are going gray. White really. And that’s not as easy to fix as the top of my head, given the proximity to my precious eyeballs.  I color them in with the smudgy tip from my eyeliner, but I think they are winning.

I have considerable artistic ability – as you can see by the expert sketch above – so I’ll continue to apply my color remedy.

What I don’t understand is the strays.  If my eyebrows are getting white, you would think that the extraneous eyebrows that grow all over my lids would get white too.  BUT NOooo……!  I’ve got white eyebrows and black weeds.

(annotated for your convenience)

I pluck out the unruly guys.  Every evening I pluck.   Every morning I have another.  How fast does eyebrow hair grow?  I think I could be the Rapunzel of eyebrows.

The women’s magazines warn you not to overpluck your brows, because you damage the follicles and they won’t grow back.  Well, I’ve been trying to damage my rogue follicles for TWENTY-FIVE YEARS.  They are not only healthy; I think they are procreating.

I am wondering if my eyebrow hairs are perhaps experiencing some age-related regret.  All their little lives, they wished they were eyelashes, so they are migrating down there — sort of a ciliary bucketlist.

About these ads

15 Comments

  1. Oh my!!! You poor, poor thing!!! You need to whip those puppies into shape! I have never had nice eyebrows. Never. I finally broke down when I turned 50 and started to get them waxed. Wished I would have spent the money on that years ago because it is so much better! I leave it to the “professionals” now…..maybe you could use some of that product that men use on their mustaches to make them blend in????? Or maybe not… laughing at your post but not at your predicament!

  2. Thank you for the lovely annotated illustrations. You haven’t been spending time with Andy Rooney have you? I suspect his wild eyebrow affliction is contagious.

    • I actually thought of Andy Rooney when I wrote this, but he is about 108, so I didn’t think my eyebrows were going there YET!!! Jeesh!

  3. Rapunzel! OH My GOSH I’m cracking up. Mainly because I can SOOOO relate to this eyebrow thing. I have a pact with my closest friends…If one of us ends up in a coma, the others must show up with tweezers and ask all visitors to leave while they wade the forrest. LOVE your writing!
    Libby Lu

    • That is one pact I need to create. And if my friends could add a little concealer under my eyes to get rid of the deep purple shadows, I would be a much healthier-looking comatose patient.

  4. OH, and “not my real eye” bahahahahahahaha btw, you ARE a good artist!

  5. Wow. You draw good. LOL
    My brother’s first wife used to pluck her eyebrows. And eat them.

    • My god, that is so horrifying, that it must be true.

  6. I quit dying my hair and now it is a healthy, happy white. Eyebrows – brown as ever – not a grey hair in the bunch. Isn’t it amazing and amusing how our bodies respond to aging!

  7. I am shocked that something in a women’s magazine has turned out be untrue. Shocked!

  8. I feel so selfish thinking I was the only one with special Rapunzel eyebrows, lashes, and chin hairs too. LOL! Loved your post!

  9. I thought it was just me, if I don’t pay attention where my eyebrows are supposed to be looks non existant but there seems to be black fur growing on my eyelids. I’m wondering if I can train it in such a way that it will hide the droop thats gathering there?

    • No you are not alone – there seems to be a lot of us!

  10. At least you’re still only drawing eyebrows on paper. You’re still in the safe zone, as far as I’m concerned.

  11. Maybe they are running from the tweezers.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,786 other followers

%d bloggers like this: